I had an interesting "water cooler" conversation with one of my coworkers in the kitchen this morning. We were talking about relationships and how having different interests (rather than seeking a mate who shares your interests) can actually make the relationship stronger. This came up in relationship to remaining friends with exes. I never have stayed friends with any of them, but I've typically found we have little in common once we break up. In my marriage I would say that Benjamin and I don't share a lot of interests/hobbies, but we have many shared philosophies and life goals. From my point of view those are the more important things to agree on. We also discussed the American idea that your mate should fulfill all of your interpersonal needs and what an unhealthy expectation that creates. I think it's better to get your interpersonal needs met through a variety of channels including your partner, friends, family, hobbies, and ideally work as well. If you're reading this, tell me what your approach is. Does your mate share most of your interests or are your interests largely different? How does that work for you? Have your past relationships revealed a pattern in this area? Tell all. ;)